Being Perfect...not.

So it's raining today...and my kid is taking a nap at the moment so I'm sitting here contemplating some things. Had me a little drama yesterday. Which I haven't had in awhile. It actually stemmed from something that was a long time ago. Although this particular person tried to convince me of *their* truth which is so far from the truth it's a little scary, I KNOW what the truth is so its not an issue for me. It's an issue for them. I sleep at night, ya know what I'm saying? Lol 

Anyways, in this conversation, it was said to me 'Do not try sprinkle holy water on me'...

Now. I laughed when I read that because in no way, shape, or form was I trying to sprinkle holy water. But today it's made me think about several different situations in my life where my 'friends' or 'acquaintances' made statements that they didn't want to tell ME something cuz I would look down on them or that I thought I was perfect. 

Really? I REALLY beg to differ. I don't why in the world anyone would think that I thought I was perfect? Cuz I KNOW that I'm far from it. With that said, there is a standard moral code that I live by that I don't think is out of the ordinary. I respect my husband and our marriage, I take care of my kid/bonus kids, and I try to do the right thing. Do I think there is 'black and white' and 'right and wrong'? ABSOLUTELY. And you better believe I stand up for what I believe in. There's simple things in life that are just that. Black and white. Right and wrong. Do I always pick the right thing? No, of course not. Hello, human over here. For the most part though, yeah, I do my best to make good decisions no matter how much I can be tempted sometimes. 

It makes me think about a time that I told my husband (and for all you adult softball players, do not think you have hurt my feelings in this cuz they honestly weren't, it was just a thought that ran across my mind lol)...in the middle of a conversation and I don't remember exactly what the whole subject was but I said that I felt like everyone that I always played ball with liked me, but I never got invited to anything outside of softball...although I knew they all did things together...a lot. I remember that I felt like they didn't think that I liked to go out and do things or that I was goody-goody (this was back during my singleness) etc etc. Maybe they thought I was gonna sprinkle holy water on them or something? Lol or heck maybe they just didnt like me that much? Lol I dont know. Then a time, when one of my BEST friends of all people, didn't want to tell me some things that were going on in a relationship and her response was 'I didn't want you to think bad of me'...seriously??? 

Honest to goodness. Even though, I'm heavily opinionated, I'm very objective all in the same breath. I have a friend that when he wants to know the honest truth on something calls me and the first first sentence out of his mouth is (this has happened several times) 'Hey, I need to ask you something. I know your objective'...to this day I know he'd still do it if he really needed something important.  I don't think I've ever scolded my friends for something they did. Was I honest? Yeah. That's what they've grown to expect from me, I think. 

I've done plenty I'm not proud of and so has everyone else. And if you come to me, I'm gonna lay it out cut and dry for you. But ya know what, good friends appreciate that. And if you can't be honest with your friends, who can you be honest with? You don't do anyone favors by lying to them and agreeing with them when you know it's wrong. But I don't think any friend that has come to me in confidence about something would say I made them feel worse. I could be wrong, but I don't feel like I am. I feel like my friends always walk away from me smiling whether we just talked about death, drugs, bad relationships or sunshine, puppies, and rainbows. 

So, on that note, regardless of what you think you know from Facebook, my public service announcements, or soapboxes, I don't think I'm perfect or that I'm gonna sprinkle holy water on you (still funny to me lol) But my apple didn't fall to far from my father's tree and I will continue to give my opinion and I will always share my personal experiences with someone. Whether that gets me 5 friends or 500, so be it. I stay true to myself. That's how God made me and He loves me.  

Have a wonderful, rainy day!

My Light at the End of the Tunnel!

So I've been contemplating writing about this for awhile but kept putting it off because I didn't really want to write about my business. Before you stop reading because you're tired of hearing about ItWorks from me, know that the story isn't really about ItWorks. It's more about me and Joe. It's actually something I never really wanted to put out there this publicly even though I've talked about it openly, no problem. This is just a whole different forum. So here goes...

When I met Joe (he will probably kill me for this blog, but he'll get over it), let's just say the boy wasn't doin' too hot financially. I won't go into everything that got him there. There were a lot of contributing factors and it wouldn't all be what you would think.

With that said, Joe was in a pickle. Quite the financial pickle. And it seemed like no matter what Joe did, the pickle got bigger and bigger....and bigger. The poor guy, honest to goodness, could NOT catch a break.

This is that part of the story that the normal girl says 'uh forget this crazy, dramatic mess', but oh no, not Erica Reynolds. By golly, IIIIII was gonna help him out of this pickle. Little ol' me, with my credit union job lol. With that said, on the day that the outside world decides we're rich which will probably be when I'm 60 and Joe's 70 and someone says oh...she was just a gold digger who found her a financially stable older man...whoever reads this blog can slap that person :)

So we get married and Joe did have a good job at the time, but suddenly after two months of marriage and me praying nightly, daily, CONSTANTLY that he would get sent to day shift...he got sent to day shift alright. Day shift at the house. Thanks God. You're pretty funny, aren't ya. Joe was obviously fired. With that said, I will stand up for my husband any day of the week when it comes to this. Yes, he can be lazy. Yes, he can sit and watch tv for hours. But let me say this, when my husband works, he knows how to work. He's a hardworker and he's very smart. While being let go, he was actually told he was too incompetent to run a machine he had been running for 8 years. I mean really? I think everyone at his previous employer knows that there was something else behind that firing. They might not have liked Joe, but I don't think anyone in that building would ever call Joe incompetent. End of story.

So, we go down to one paycheck. My measly paycheck. (We did eventually get unemployment, but it took awhile...to go from the kind of money he was making to unemployment was not pretty) Mind you, Joe pays child support on 3 children. Not one payment was ever missed and let me add it took a year and a half to get lowered and it wasn't even lowered to what he was technically making. Joe was imputed a wage. Basically saying you are capable of making this much even though you are not. So pretty much with that said, God was doing some serious watching over us. When I look back at that year, there should have been no logical way that we should have made it financially. No way. BUT we did. We might have gone 2 months without buying groceries (yes Im very serious) at one point but we made it.

We end up moving out by my parents. I get pregnant unexpectedly and literally cried like I was 16 and pregnant. I was NOT excited in the least really. So here we are getting ready to have 6 people every other weekend in a 3 bedroom trailer. Let's recap here, if you haven't read my other blogs. My husband has a six year old with Angelman Syndrome. This is not a child that can sleep with anyone else in the room. No stimulation, no nothing. So she HAS to be in a room by herself. Then the other two girls are in a room. Then us. Then where does the baby go!?! This was an absolute catastrophe in my head. My own baby wasn't gonna get to have a room! How unfair is that....now that we are at six months of age, I have realized this was not as big of a deal as I had made it in my head, but nonetheless. She has a room, but doesn't sleep in it when the girls are here. Works out fine.

So, getting to the good stuff and light at the end of the tunnel.

I had several friends ask me when i was pregnant, 'Are you gonna stay home with the baby?'...to which my response was 'ARE YOU KIDDING ME? Have you seen our bills? We have 3 kids getting child support checks? We have debt coming out our ears? No I can't stay home with my kid! Hahahahaha you're hilarious!'

Well the time comes. I have Ali. I stay home for a total of two weeks. You heard me. We couldn't financially handle it. I wasn't getting paid leave so it was just bad. I would take Ali to work (my boss so graciously allowed this) and Joe would pick her up when he got done with his route (I forgot to add, he now runs a bread route...oh and that incompetent guy that magically couldn't run a machine he'd been running for 8 years is suddenly a top distributor....hmmm incompetence. Joe loves to use that word more than the average person now) After Ali hit six weeks, I started taking her to daycare. About two weeks later, I'm on Facebook and see that my friend Dana has posted about a product she is selling. I remember she was almost discreet with her status and didn't really name what she was selling. I message her cuz I'm nosey. 'What are selling? Body wraps?' I had used my context clues...'yes'....My immediate thought was...I could do that. I met with Dana. We talked. Of course, I said I had to talk to Joe. Now mind you, I had already tried the direct sales route, but it didn't work out. I am just not a salesman believe it or not. It makes me want to break out in hives. I can literally feel my face start to sweat when I feel like I'm trying to sell something....

So I get home..

Me: Joe...so I think I'm gonna try selling this stuff..
Joe: Um I'm pretty sure we already figured out, you are not a salesperson.
Me: Yeaaaahhhh but this is just $99, it comes with four wraps. I know I can sell those. If I hate it, I'll just quit. It's not really a commitment or anything and I'll make my money back...
Joe: Whatever I guess...you decide.

So of course, I'm like what the heck, I'm doing it.

So i signed up Saturday, March 31st. Sunday morning, I remember I posted a status saying what the wrap had done for me. I remember I could wear a pair of pants that I hadn't been able to wear since I had been pregnant. There were over 60 comments on that status. From Sunday to that Tuesday, 56 people had contacted me. I had no idea. I was so overwhelmed, I didn't even know how to act. People were asking me if I DID parties, to be put on waiting lists. I mean this stuff was the SHIZ! I literally couldn't hardly work for my phone going off.

I quit my 'real' job two weeks after starting, I believe. I really wrestled with it, cuz I just couldn't believe in my head that this was totally more than too good to be true. I have doubled my income that I made at my best paying 'job'. I stay home with my baby, which is something I NEVER thought would be even remotely possible. We have paid off two loans in the last month. About to pay off another in the next couple of weeks. I feel SO BLESSED. Like there is finally a light at the end of this four year, DARK financial tunnel. Like I can breathe and unravel. I literally felt like I was wadded up in a ball and I can stretch out now and literally feel myself uncrinkle(if thats a word) sometimes. And I can appreciate my baby and every little move she makes, and every giggle she let's out. I keep thinking it can't get better and then it just gets...better. I haven't gotten my house with a pool yet, but I definitely look at my Remax App every night lol.

To wake up to texts from excited customers that feel so much better about themselves, from customers that wanted tummy tucks, and wanted lipo, and customers that just wanted help getting over a plateau or wanted to make sure and fit in that wedding dress perfectly and still being able to breathe. Or the people that workout religiously and just want to look even more ridiculously hot in their bathing suits on vacation...I love it. I LOVE IT. Period.

I never, EVER thought my $99 dollars and 4 little wraps would turn into such a blessing. I mean I'm seriously pinching myself everyday. To date, It Works has allowed us to pay off 5 medical bills (mainly from my pregnancy) and 3 loans!!

Here's my sales pitch. If you wanna call it that. The $99 deal ends December 31st. After that, it will be $199. You will get 8 wraps in that kit, so you will still make your money back, but still. This is also the last month you can join and qualify for the $10,000 GOOD Bonus (I got that, you can too). So just take the jump now. Quit hesitating. It's $99. You'll spend it on something else you probably don't even need. Call me...email me...text me...just don't miss out.

501-207-1256
ereynolds4409@gmail.com
www.wrapsrock.info
www.wrapsrock.com

Are you a duck or an eagle??

No one can make you serve customers well.....that's because great service is a choice. Harvey Mackay, tells a wonderful story about a cab driver that proved this point.

He was waiting in line for a ride at the airport. When a cab pulled up, the first thing Harvey noticed was that the taxi was polished to a bright shine. Smartly dressed in a white shirt, black tie, and freshly pressed black slacks, the cab driver jumped out and rounded the car to open the back passenger door for Harvey ...

He handed my friend a laminated card and said: 'I'm Wally, your driver. While I'm loading your bags in the trunk I'd like you to read my mission statement.'

Taken aback, Harvey read the card.. It said: Wally's Mission Statement: To get my customers to their destination in the quickest, safest and cheapest way possible in a friendly environment...

This blew Harvey away. Especially when he noticed that the inside of the cab matched the outside. Spotlessly clean!

As he slid behind the wheel, Wally said, 'Would you like a cup of coffee? I have a thermos of regular and one of decaf.' My friend said jokingly, 'No, I'd prefer a soft drink.' Wally smiled and said, 'No problem I have a cooler up front with regular and Diet Coke, water and orange juice..' Almost stuttering, Harvey said, 'I'll take a Diet Coke.'

Handing him his drink, Wally said, 'If you'd like something to read, I have The Wall Street Journal, Time, Sports Illustrated andUSA Today.'

As they were pulling away, Wally handed my friend another laminated card, These are the stations I get and the music they play, if you'd like to listen to the radio.'

And as if that weren't enough, Wally told Harvey that he had the air conditioning on and asked if the temperature was comfortable for him.

Then he advised Harvey of the best route to his destination for that time of day. He also let him know that he'd be happy to chat and tell him about some of the sights or, if Harvey preferred, to leave him with his own thoughts.

'Tell me, Wally,' my amazed friend asked the driver, 'have you always served customers like this?'

Wally smiled into the rear view mirror. 'No, not always.. In fact, it's only been in the last two years. My first five years driving, I spent most of my time complaining like all the rest of the cabbies do. Then I heard the personal growth guru, Wayne Dyer, on the radio one day.

He had just written a book called You'll See It When You Believe It.

Dyer said that if you get up in the morning expecting to have a bad day, you'll rarely disappoint yourself. He said, 'Stop complaining! Differentiate yourself from your competition. Don't be a duck. Be an eagle. Ducks quack and complain. Eagles soar above the crowd..'

'That hit me right between the eyes,' said Wally. 'Dyer was really talking about me. I was always quacking and complaining, so I decided to change my attitude and become an eagle. I looked around at the other cabs and their drivers. The cabs were dirty, the drivers were unfriendly, and the customers were unhappy. So I decided to make some changes. I put in a few at a time. When my customers responded well, I did more.'

'I take it that has paid off for you,' Harvey said.

'It sure has,' Wally replied. 'My first year as an eagle, I doubled my income from the previous year. This year I'll probably quadruple it.

You were lucky to get me today. I don't sit at cabstands anymore. My customers call me for appointments on my cell phone or leave a message on my answering machine. If I can't pick them up myself, I get a reliable cabbie friend to do it and I take a piece of the action.'

Wally was phenomenal. He was running a limo service out of a Yellow Cab. I've probably told that story to more than fifty cab drivers over the years, and only two took the idea and ran with it. Whenever I go to their cities, I give them a call. The rest of the drivers quacked like ducks and told me all the reasons they couldn't do any of what I was suggesting..

Wally the Cab Driver made a different choice. He decided to stop quacking like ducks and start soaring like eagles.


How about us? Smile, and the whole world smiles with you... The ball is in our hands! A man reaps what he sows. Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up... let us do good to all people.

Ducks Quack, Eagles Soar !

Are you a duck or an eagle? 

I love this story. It's so true that we caught up in the negative things in our jobs...think about what we all could do just by keeping a smile on our face :D *Ting* lol

My New Idea

So I've opened an online store....more things to be added daily....check it out.  This is for us Step-moms and Step-dads that never gets stuff devoted to us lol.  I know some of us are evil, but not all of us are :D

Check it out and pass the word and share the link if you want too :D

Diaries Of A Bonus Mom Online Store

-Erica :)

My Letter to Mae

Dear Mae,

Oh my goodness. You have to be one of the most beautiful kids I've ever seen. I worry daily about how your dad will act when you're a teenager, because let's face it, you will not lack in the area of prospective dates. With the way he acts now when you hug a boy 'friend', I feel for you. Maybe he will soften in his old age when the time comes. I hope, for your sake anyways.

I always wonder, with you having a sister like AJ, if you will grow up to be sincerely compassionate or if you will have a great disdain for her. I know it's hard for you. Always having to feel like you have to keep an eye on her or she'll eat your barbies, or pull your hair, or sit/waller/or practically jump on you, or destroy the room that you JUST cleaned. I hope one day you realize that she's just crazy about you and wants to be in the same room with you and wants to sit next to you. I really don't think she's trying to tick you off...ALTHOUGH I have seen her grab a handful of hair when you jerked a toy from her. You TTTT-totally deserved that one!

I know sometimes you think AJ gets more attention than you, but I hope you realize one day that YOU are the lucky one. I've tried to explain this before, but you're five and I'm not sure if you 'get it', hopefully one day you will. Part of me, deep down, is insanely worried that you will look for attention in all the wrong places when you get older, because you felt as if you were second-best due to all of AJ's needs.

You're smart. Really smart and I knew it a long time ago. And conniiiiivvving. Lol. I see myself in you even though you're not 'mine'. I see you do things and those wheels turning in that head of yours. Always trying to figure out how to get away with something or how to get someone else to take the blame (mainly Alexis lol). I always call you on it and you just stare me down and then 90% of the time you will crack a smile because you know I'm right! Maybe i should let you get away with it. But I don't want to because I don't want you to think it's ok. I want you to learn early that people will figure it out. Maybe Im paranoid, but I just want you to be a good person. A good name means more than any amount of money or social status. The only reason I pick up on it is because it's exactly how my brain worked at that age. You're just a big sister and I was a little sister. I had no one to manipulate lol. I grew out of it, hopefully you will too, because a mind like yours can do a lot of great things.

I know that you will be such a good big sister to Ali. I can tell already that you're gonna be a motherly type. You always want to make sure everyone is doing what they're supposed to be doing. Your mind is like a little daily planner. You want to know everything we are doing every time you're here from start to finish. I'm not sure why. I guess five year olds need to be prepared for all their daily tasks haha. I will never forget when you came to the hospital to see Ali. I don't think I've ever seen you more truly excited (except when you and Alexis opened the dollhouse Big Daddy and Gigi got you for Christmas this year lol). You came thru the door just cheesing from ear to ear and then you kind of hid behind your mom with a huge grin on your face, but like you didn't know what to do lol. Even tonight, when you got up to get a drink before bed and I had just brought Ali in the living room to feed her and laid her on the couch. I was at the refrigerator and you looked at Ali on the couch from across the room and stopped and then started walking toward the hallway. Then turned back around, stopped, and ran over to kiss her on the cheek real fast and ran back down the hallway. You never even saw me watching you, but my heart just melted.

You are so intelligent, sweet (when you want to be lol), helpful, gorgeous, and have so much potential. I hope I get to see you use it all to every extent because the world won't know what hit them when you do.

Love,
Erica

My Worst/Best Experience Ever

First picture of me holding her :) She's checking me out!

First camera-captured smile!

First Sunday at church :)

Hanging out with me for a day :)

The whole time I was pregnant, I was thinking that I wouldn't be that bad in the labor room. I usually psych myself out about pain and it always ends up never being as bad as I had imagined in my head. THIS on the other will NEVER fall under that category. It was awful. A.W.F.U.L.

Woke up at about 1:30 in the morning Sunday, February 5th, feeling a strange cramping. At first I just thought, 'I have a stomach ache' and quickly fell back asleep. Woke up again about 1:45 with the same pain and it suddenly dawned on me that I hadn't felt cramping in awhile...9 months obviously. Oh crap! I thought. I ran to the bathroom to find one of the first signs of labor staring back at me. I won't name it cuz I don't want to make the guys that read this gag lol. I stayed in there a minute...now shaking because this is that moment that I had been terrified of. The moment that you, as a pregnant girl, know that there is definitely no turning back now. You are about to endure some pain. It's inevitable. Kill me now. I had a couple more contractions while sitting there googling 'what do contractions feel like' on my phone lol. Answer: Mild to severe cramping. Oooooh man! I go back to our bedroom. Tell Joe that what had happened and I'm extremely nervous. He tells me to calm down cuz my water hasn't broke yet and Dr. Citty told me to endure as much as possible. They get about five minutes apart and I call the hospital and they tell me to come in so they can check me. We get to the hospital about six in the morning and they start monitoring me, but I'm not dilated at all. The contractions continuously become faster and faster and they won't give me any pain meds because they don't want to slow down labor while I'm there. They checked me three times while I was there which hurts REALLY bad people. REALLY BAD. And for some reason apparently I am hard to check. From what I hear my cervix is high...meaning it felt like they trying to go elbow deep in me to find out how much I was dilated. Too much information you say? Well guess what! It's not as painful to hear about it as it was to endure it! So back off! Lol. The nurse asked me to walk around the hospital for an hour and to come back and see if I had progressed any. To show you how much I didn't want to get checked again...I walked around for 2 1/2 hours lol. When I went back, I was only to a 1. Not good enough. I started crying with that last check, and then the nurse told me she was going to send me home. My crying got a little more intense. At this point my contractions were about a minute apart and mind you no pain medicine at this point and they were gonna send me home?? I said, amidst crying, 'How will I know when to come back??'

Response: 'Oh honey...they will get worse. You will know.'

How could I 'know'? To me, it was already bad. I started crying more. I start getting ready to leave. Joe had to put my shoes on because I literally couldn't bend over during contractions. I'm sure Joe at this point probably thought I was being pretty pathetic, but nonetheless.

We go home, I literally overdosed for the next twelve hours on tylenol. It slowed down to every ten or fifteen minutes. They were more intense, but there was enough time in between that I could recuperate if you will lol. By that night...the Tylenol quit working. I literally took six baths from the time I got home to when I left to go back. It was the only thing that helped with the intensity. About midnite, I had decided I thought I just might meet Jesus that night. Everytime I had one, I would literally start walking around the bed with my hands on the bed and screaming crying. No joke. It was terrible. My mom was timing them and they were so sporadic. It was crazy. Probably because of all my Tylenol lol. I couldn't believe the amount of pain I was in. I was just in so much shock of how terrible it was. I finally decided it couldn't get worse and we headed to the hospital. I had become a cussing machine. MA.CHINE. I had to have sounded like an addict. On the way there, this was me...

'I don't give a $&@? what they $&@):$; do! I need drugs! I'm gonna die! I need drugs! If they don't give me some $)&@ drugs, I'm gonna $&@);$& flip out! I'm gonna flip out!'

Add a few more expletives and you'll get pretty close to my demeanor that night lol.

When I got there, they start asking me the same questions as 24 hours earlier. I literally couldn't talk thru contractions. I couldn't do anything but scream and cry. It was awful. BUT finally, I was dilated to a 3-4 and 90% effaced. Which was a lot if progress considering! So I get admitted to a room and they tell me they have to check me again because i have to be a five before they can call the anesthesiologist for the epidural. I started crying again (I was already crying because of contractions lol). 'I can't right now, I can't!! I need a minute! I need a minute!' The nurse said 'Ok, but I can't call until I can check you'...she leaves the room.

At this point, my husband decides to say the wrong thing..it went a little something like this..

Joe: You're gonna have to chill out Erica
Me: SHUT THE $&@? UP!

You can guess the expletive I used. It is by far, the best expletive for pregnancy. I don't care what anyone says lol. God has already forgiven me for my expletive usage so do not judge me! :)

So I toughen up and let her check me and in that fifteen minutes I had already gotten to a five and 100%. Enough to get an epidural. Praise the Lord. I'd always heard about how still you have to be while getting and epidural and that they hurt, but at that point, you could care less. Let me just say. I COULD CARE LESS WHAT THEY STUCK IN ME! A 5" diameter needle would have been acceptable. I literally kept thinking, I'm going to meet Jesus. Tonight. Definitely tonight. Me and Him are gonna walk the golden streets TONIGHT. I must say the anesthesiologist came very quickly, with that said, he was not Mr. Personality. I mean I know it was 4:30 in the morning, but it's ok to smile. You're already up anyways. Might as well make the best of it. Not that I was at my best, personality wise. I kept trying to tell the nurses that I was normally really nice lol.

For the epidural, they made everyone leave the room except for the needle man and one nurse. I was bent over a pillow on the side of the bed and the nurse was holding my hands...

Me: Do people ever talk to Jesus out loud in here..
Nurse: Yeah..sometimes lol
Me: I'm bout to
Nurse: Well do whatever you need to do lol

But in that moment, he started shooting stuff in me and I'm telling you, in about 45 seconds, God had answered my prayers. It was like magic! My legs felt like big old heavy logs and it was amazing lol. I told the needle man that he was my new favorite person. And his response was the wave of a hand and a very monotone 'Have a good day'...I'm not sure who peed in his cheerios, but I don't care what time of the day/night it is, I enjoy when someone tells me I'm their favorite and it usually makes me crack a smile. Just saying....

I felt completely normal and fantastic except tired (I hadn't slept in about 24 hours at this point and had endured A LOT of pain) so this is where my normal joking self kicked my in...

Then I got my first catheter ever, because I was now hooked up to this IV and epidural. There was no getting up at this point...I informed the nurse that I was sorry. I had not been able to see down there for about a month...lol She started laughing and told me not to worry becuz most women hadn't seen theirs for more extended periods than that and I was doing good for only a month! BAHAHA! I thought that was funny lol

They let everyone back in and as Joe describes it, 'I came back in the room to Erica' Lol. I had literally turned into a different person before the epidural. One time I went to this conference and the preacher said, 'When life squeezes you, what do you ooze?'...let's just say, I was not oozing Jesus before that epidural lmbo!

Joe was watching the contraction monitor and he asked if I could feel it when the numbers were rising and I said NOPE!! :D 'You can't feel it at all?' NOPE AND IT'S AWWWEEEESSOOOMMMEEE!!!! lol

So from there is was smooth sailing. Even pushing didn't 'hurt', just felt a lot of pressure. Dr. Citty came in at the last minute. I might have pushed five more times when he got there and Ali had arrived.

Then the stitches. Which I didn't have to have that many, but my epidural was wearing off and it wasn't hurting, but I could definitely tell what he was doing and it was uncomfortable and this is when they first gave me Ali. I felt so funny because I couldn't 'take her in' because I was so focused on him stitching lol. I was trying to look at her, but I just kept watching him pull back this long, thick string and he worked on me. I couldn't process her. They took her and cleaned her up a bit more and brought her back. By that point, he had finished stitching and everyone was gone (nurse and doctor wise).

At that point, I got a good minute to cry a little bit. I was trying not to do the ugly cry so my eyes just watered A LOT. My mom said, "Erica, she's so pretty. She's not ugly at all" lol which yes, I was worried about her being pretty. But all I could say was "She's ok". I was so happy that she was ok. Nothing was wrong. She had ten toes and ten fingers. My whole pregnancy I was consumed with her 'being ok'. I already face days with a disabled child, so I think I was more consumed with this thought than most pregnant mom. I was more worried about her being healthy than anything and she was. A happy, healthy 7.6 lbs and 21 1/2 inches long. My long, skinny baby lol.

So that night and the next day, we just stared at Ali. I left the hospital believing that everyone thought I had the most beautiful baby in the whole world. Sound familiar moms? I doubt I'm the only one hahahaha.

We got home and Joe said 'Well, you don't have to just call yourself a bonus mom now. You're a momma'

Yeeaaahhhh and I have to say that it feels pretty good. Ya know a lot of times stepmoms get the shaft. They are mom when the kids are at their house, regardless of what people think. We walk around behind them picking up stuff, cooking three times a day, loving, hugging, trying to make scratches feel better and all the junk, but we aren't 'mom' and not only the kids, but others are also good at reminding us of that. But now I am 'mom'. And when my kid cries for someone, it will probably be me. Even if it sounds selfish or maybe a little vain, I don't care. Because since I've never felt that, it's a little more special to me :D

So I say my worst/best experience because the first half was horrendous, but the latter was AWWWEEESSSOOOMMMMEEEE :D

Sports really do reflect life sometimes...

So last night, I went to walmart and ran into a friend that I played adult softball with. He asked me if I would do some pitching lessons for a couple of girls that are interested in learning. I said yes...I've always said yes to this, but when asked I've also always said, 'Here's the thing, I can show your daughter something, but you've got to practice a lot outside of me helping her...' I continue to explain to them that I three probably about 300+ days out of the year. A lot of times my dad would have to drag me outside because I was perfectly content to sit in the air conditioning and watch Maury Povich on summer morning and also perfectly content to stay in a heated house in the dead of winter lol. Nonetheless, every day that we practiced, I threw a hundred balls if not more sometimes. With that said, and I'm not afraid to say it because I worked my butt off, I was the best around here during my 'prime' lol

I started pitching in the 8th grade. I could always throw hard, but strikes were few and far between. Not to mention, I had a terrible attitude. Ter.Ri.Ble. Lol. Really though at that point in time, nobody could throw a strike so I wasn't really alone! But for two years, I threw and I threw and I threw. Tenth grade rolled around and I played for the highschool team. I got to pitch occasionally. They would let me close. The first game I started. They put me against the defending state champs in a tournament. I mean seriously? They beat me all over the field. I was out in about the 3rd inning...throwing horrible with not to mention a ticked off attitude :) So the next time the coach let me attempt to start was at the next tournament and I don't know what happened, but it was like it suddenly all clicked. Suddenly, it was like I couldn't throw anything but strike. I think I struck out 17 people that game if I remember correctly. Minus the one I hit :) and a couple that hit the ball. We lost still. The girl I hit scored! Bunch of bull!! Lol

After two years though, it clicked. After all that work and repetitiveness, I got it. Obviously, I could still work on plenty of things and I did, but my point is I worked for it and I got to that very important point. I think everyone can figure out how that applies to life...

One more story and I'm out. My junior year, we had an amazing coach. Right out of college. He was awesome and very intense lol. He coached football too and totally treated us like a football team or more like one than I'd ever felt. We ran out butts off. In fact, I remember we bought my prom dress a month before prom. We had to safety pin the dead gum thing by the time the actual event rolled around. Wish I had somebody to force me to run now lol

Anyways, I remember it was our first conference game of the season against Morrilton. Each team got a chance for a good warm up before the games. Coach Cash hit each fielder a ball and let me just say...I don't know what happened...but we looked like complete idiots. The other team was even giggling at us. We walked back to the dugout after our warm up and he went to yelling and screaming and threw a bat across the dugout lol. I laugh about it now, but then I was thinking, 'Oh. My. Gosh. Kill. Me. Now.' lol I think we were all slightly mortified. Then the craziest thing happened, the game started and it was like we couldn't make a mistake. We beat them all over the field. Obliterated them.

I've literally compared that game to mine and Joe's marriage before. Not that everything is hunky dory now, cuz we have outside circumstances that affect us a lot and will for a long time. Strictly between Joe and I, 95% of the time we are quite lovely lol. But our first year of marriage was horrendous. HORRENDOUS. You could not ask for more to happen to a newly married couple than what happened to us as far as outside circumstances go. Most couples that have gone thru what we have would absolutely no longer be married. That's why at this point I'm like, 'Nothing can separate us'....cuz pretty much everything has already tried lol.

Insert footnote here:
It's also why I have NO sympathy for some couples getting divorced. If all you can tell me is that you and your spouse argue a lot or you're poor, or something completely ridiculous that you could totally work thru if you tried. Please do not come to me. I love to have a good counseling session every now and then with friends, but you better have something legit to complain about!

But I remember when all that stuff was happening, thinking about that game, as odd as it is. Thinking about how awful that warm-up was and then we beat them to a pulp. I remember saying to myself 'This is just a nasty warm-up. Let the games begin...'